Starting with belief

A lot of people have asked me, “How’s writing going?”  And honestly, I’d like to be honest.

Q: “How’s it going?”

A:  Hazy, very gray, undefined, loose, cloudy, unstructured, wild, sometimes confusing.

More honestly, today was the first day I put on pants that didn’t have the word “yoga” in the name.  Also, today is the first day I wore makeup.  And I haven’t set an alarm all week.  It’s weird.

Dude…it’s been 7 days.  It’s been 7 days post-corporate life.  I spent the last 11 years of my life doing what someone else told me to do at work.  I spent the last 3 years wearing starched dresses, high heels, and learning how to fit into a Fortune 500 company.  I spent the last 2 years only working on other people’s projects.

It’s going to take me *a hot minute* to know my path, to get a grasp on what I need to do next, and to get into entrepreneurial mode… i.e. If it’s going to get done, I’m going to have to do it.

So people…chilllllll.

When people ask me what’s next, I find myself easily responding with: “I really believe I can accomplish a lot through writing.  I really believe I can do this.”

But if you asked me 3 weeks ago, I was going to start working in HR immediately.

If you asked me 2 weeks ago, I was going to write a book.

If you asked me 1 week ago, I would have said IDK!  And that’s the best place I’ve been this month.  Knowing that I don’t want to limit what God can do through me.  Knowing that I don’t want to box Him into my finite understanding.

So this week, my first week as an author, I just woke up everyday and asked God what I should do that day.  And I’m SUPER happy!  This is my best life!

Earlier this week, I met with my *design-minded* pastor, and just talking through ideas helped to awaken my sleepy creativity.  Instead of thinking the way I have the past few years, i.e. “Here’s why not”, I started thinking “Here’s how”.  See the diff?  I’m jussssst starting to open my mind to limitless possibility.  What can God do in me and through me?  He can change the whole world.  I’ve said that in faith for the past few years, while going into my little gray cube and keeping my head down.  It’s taking me awhile to shed those layers of small thinking, but I’m headed that way.  I want to wake up to a life where anything is possible and I’m believing God for ALL GOOD EVERYTHING!

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.
– 2 Corinthians 9

All that to say:  It starts with belief.  It starts with believing God is and He can.  It starts with knowing my identity in Christ. 

There’s a chick in the Bible who only takes up three verses, but three very profound verses:

Behold, a woman who had suffered from a hemorrhage for twelve years came up behind Jesus and touched the fringe of His garment, for she said to herself, “If I only touch His garment, I will be made well.”  Jesus turned, and seeing her He said, “Take heart, daughter; your faith has made you well.”  And instantly the woman was made well.
– Matthew 9

I’m still munching on that, but wow!  It starts with belief. 

Belief is an amazing thing.  We cannot see and receive what we don’t believe exists.  Do you believe in God’s amazing plan for your life?  I do!  Do you believe your dreams will come true?  I do!  Do you believe that God crafted you with unique gifts for a role only YOU can fill?  I do!

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For the past 2 years, I’ve kept this graphic from She Reads Truth as my phone background.  Click here if you want a daily – jk hourly…or minute-ly – reminder to believe God is at work in you.  #notsponsored #unlesstheywanttopayme 😉


 

So here’s the thing…  You’re going to be supes disappointed if you’re holding your breath for my NYT best-selling book.  And by disappointed, I mean you’ll probably pass out 😛

I’m not following a set process.  Nothing contrived, defined, quick or easy.  The only thing I know is that God will be glorified the more I surrender my ideas at the foot of the cross.

I need people to not ask “What’s your plan?”  because I don’t have it yet.  God has called me into a deep ocean, and I’ve followed.  But idk if He’s going to teach me to breathe underwater, if He’s going to send a boat, if He’s going to keep me in the ocean, or what.

I need the space to not define a plan that I made up on my own.  I need the space to not declare that things are going so great.  I fully expect to fail and fail 1000x.  But I will get up 1001x and try again.  Because I know this is my calling.  This is what I was born for.  I will not quit.  Even when the days are tough.  Even if I don’t accomplish anything for months.  Even if I can’t write a stellar book my first year as an author.  I will prevail.  Because I will not quit.  Because God has called me to this.  Because His grace and His glory are far too great.

May I amplify some really strong voices in my life lately?  <3  I’ve been really blessed by MY PEOPLE around me: my husband, my close friends, my Church.  When I announced that I quit my salary in favor of my dreams, they gave encouragement and good, solid advice. 

A close, close friend said:  “You’re truly gifted. You’re going to do amazing things!”

A *published author* friend advised:  “Here’s how you create space so you can write: eliminate the negative relationships from your life.” #goodadvice #thanks

The dad of one of my besties told me about his story of leaving corporate life, starting his own *thriving* business, and moving to America.  And then said, “Priska, I’m proud of you.”  (Yes, I cried.  Yes, ugly tears.)

And most importantly, my husband tells me all the time:  “I believe in you.”
(All the heart eyes for Rusty)

Those few, short words have been like gasoline on the fire of what God is doing in my life.  They have invigorated me, caused me to look into the deeper meaning of all of this, and given me so much joy.  I don’t tell you these details to brag about myself or my OH SO AMAZING YOU SHOULD BE JELLY friends (although they are oh so amazing you should be jelly – XO!).  I tell you this so you’ll realize that you are both a dreamer and the friend of a dreamer.  The words you speak into someone else’s dreams are either fanning the flame or stifling it.  Be the former, not the latter, K?

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(Of course, I can’t say thanks without mentioning my best assistant, Konga…see pic.)

It’s noteworthy to …well, note… that nobody whose opinion I value has offered fear to me.  Some people, whose opinions I don’t care to indulge, have offered fear, trepidation and stress.  It sounds like:  “Aren’t you concerned about this not working out?”  “What if something bad unexpectedly happens?”  “Shouldn’t you keep your existing job until you have something lined up?”  (Anonymous quotes to protect those who just don’t get it yet…)

First off, duh it could all not work out.  Would it be faith if it was a guaranteed outcome?  Secondly, go back to the fanning the flame section 😛

But MY PEOPLE have encouraged me.  Granted, I haven’t given people the notion that I would accept fear from them.  Here’s some advice to you dreamers:  When you talk about your dream, talk about your vision.  Inspire the people you’re talking to that anything IS possible.  Don’t give people the idea that fear is an acceptable response. 

A dream is like a newborn. It is delicate and requires a lot of love.

I’m believing like the Matthew 9 lady… If I only touch Jesus’ garment, I will be made well.  Join me in believing in your God-given dreams, your God-given gifts, and God’s masterful plan.

With a fiery love,
PriskaTabitha

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